What if I was on trial for murder

I was watching a show the other day about a guy that was on trial for murder and he was being defended by the public defenders. Now there is nothing wrong with public defenders, but if I am on trial for murder, I would need to bring out the big guns. So, it got me thinking about which TV lawyers I would want defending me if I was on trial for murder.

So tonight I am going to break it down for you all in two separate categories. The first list is the individual I would want defending me if I was innocent. The second, and most important list, is the individual I would want defending me if I was guilty. There is a big difference between the lawyer you want defending you if you are guilty and the one you want if you are innocent, so I will lay those out for you.

Innocent List:

If you are heading into a murder trial and you are innocent, then you need someone who is compassionate and trustworthy. You need that person to believe you and fight for you, not because it is their duty, but because they truly believe that you are innocent. It doesn't hurt either when they go out of their way to find the person who is actually guilty.

5. Sarah "Mac" MacKenzie (Catherine Bell)--JAG: Not only is she an amazing lawyer who fights for her clients, but it doesn't hurt for the jury to look at someone who is easy on the eyes. She is soft and trustworthy and she also does some investigating on her own, which always helps.
4. Victor Sifuentes (Jimmy Smits)--L.A. Law: Another one that the jury will see as easy on the eyes, but a hard nose lawyer that provides some of the most impassioned closing arguments ever given on TV. The reason he would defend me if I was innocent is because he is one of the few TV lawyers that has a conscience which is helpful when you are innocent.
3. Shirley Schmidt (Candice Bergen)--Boston Legal: If I am on trial for murder, I want someone that has years of experience and a few favors that they can call in. Shirley is one of the most respected lawyers and that would be very helpful. She is also very good at defending innocent people because she likes to believe them and it makes her work harder.
2. Perry Mason (Raymond Burr)--Perry Mason: The king of all TV lawyers. Mason always defending innocent people and lucky for me, he always found the real killer.
1. Jimmy "The Grunt" Berluti (Michael Badalucco)--The Practice: An odd choice here, but let me tell you about The Grunt. Jimmy is always the underdog in every case he goes into. He is seen as incompetent and beneath most other lawyers. That is exactly the guy I want defending me for murder. I want someone that has something to prove and that knows they can't lose, not only for my good, but for their own good as well. I want the little guy fighting for me. Jimmy also always believed his clients and liked helping out those who were truly innocent.

Guilty List:

If you are guilty of murder, you need a lawyer that doesn't give two shits about you and could care less if you go to jail for life. You need a lawyer who isn't compassionate, but a lawyer that believes every person deserves a fair trail and a lawyer that will fight for you even though they know you are guilty. These are a different breed. Truth be told, there aren't many of these characters out there, so the shows to choose from are few and far between.

5. Denny Crane (Willam Shatner)--Boston Legal: Denny would be number one if he didn't suffer from mad cows disease. First of all, Denny has never lost a case, or at least that is what he says. Secondly, he is Denny Crane man, just ask him. Denny just wants to win. The facts don't matter, he may not even learn my name, but what do I care, I just want to get set free.
4. Bobby Donnell (Dylan McDermott)--The Practice: Many might think that Bobby is number one. There is no doubt that Bobby gave the best closings in TV history and he always the person you want to do your closing. Bobby would fight for the guilty, but the thing that keeps him down on my list is that he always has a crisis of consciousness. I really don't need that in a murder trial. Bobby usually wins, so he will do.
3. Jack McCoy (Sam Waterston)--Law & Order: Okay, I know that he usually puts people in jail, but if he would ever switch sides, I would hire him in a heartbeat. The man does anything and everything he can to win and I could use that. It never bothers him to break the law to serve the law, and that is what I would need if I was guilty for murder.
2. Alan Shore (James Spader)--Boston Legal: If I was on trial for murder, I would need a lawyer that doesn't care that I am on trial for murder, all they care about it winning and serving the law. That is what Alan does. It also doesn't hurt that is always able to "pull a rabbit out of his hat." I mean that man got Al Sharpton to come in and speak for one of his clients. Alan simply wins and does it with great passion. If you are guilty, you need a lawyer that defends you as if you were innocent and Alan Shore does that.
1. Eugene Young (Steve Harris)--The Practice: One word and one letter provide the reason for Eugene being number one: "Plan B." Eugene was the king of Plan B and never worried about using it. For those of you that don't know, Plan B is where you are defending someone that is pretty much going to lose, so you put up a friendly witness and you accuse them of committing the crime, thus establishing reasonable doubt. Plan B always works and Eugene is the best. Eugene also never has a crisis of conscience during a trial, though he might afterwards, but that is not my problem. He also never has a problem getting a guilty person off on a technicality, so hey go for it. Eugene Young is the perfect defense lawyer because he fights for the law, not the person. You don't want a lawyer that cares about you if you are guilty, you want one that cares about winning and serving the law.